Hiei's First Bath!
by Zombiifissh
Summary: Wherein Yusuke and Kuwabara get our two demons drunk! Hiei is afraid of the water, but needs to take a bath. KuraHiei. Kinda crackish.
1. 1: The Drunkenness

Title: Hiei's First Bath!

Pairings: HieixKurama

Rated: T (NO SEX, GUYS! ;P)

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. Because I'm poor.

Author's note: 'Dis be my first fic so don't be too harsh with your reviews (if you decide to give me any) please! So anyway, it turns out that Hiei is afraid of the water because he is a fire demon and all that. Hiei and Kurama get dirty (NOT THAT WAY!!) and he has to give Hiei a bath. :)

Hiei approached the clearing where Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Kurama stood waiting for him. He was the last to arrive. "So what did you need, Detective?" Hiei asked blankly. Kuwabara answered for him.

"We were thinking, right, and—"

"You? Thinking?" the short one asked sarcastically. Kuwabara twitched a bit, making his orangey hair bounce a little. (I love the non-word orangey!)

"WATCH IT, SHORTY, OT I'LL PUMMEL YA!" he raged. "Okay., so it was Urameshi's idea, but… We figured that it'd be real fun to all go out and drink together!" he finished.

Hiei stared at the grinning Yusuke and Kuwabara like the idiots they were. "I'm leaving," he said flatly. He turned to go.

"Wait, Hiei," Kurama said, smiling a little. Hiei stopped but didn't look back. "It could be interesting. Won't you stay with… us… for at least a little while?" Kurama asked, holding back his urge to say 'me' instead of 'us.' Hiei's shoulders lowered a bit. He turned back to the group with a sigh, looking away to the right. He never could argue with that fox and win.

"Fine. I'll stay. For a while," he said shortly. Kurama smiled again.

"YAHOO!" Yusuke and Kuwabara exclaimed.

--later, at one of the local bars that Yusuke bribed to get beer from—

Kuwabara fell off his barstool, giggling like a maniac.

"Guess Kuwabara's out," Yusuke said thickly.

"Looks like you're about to hit your limit too, Yusuke," Kurama said. He and Hiei were both sitting rather composedly at the bar, kicking back shots. They'd both had over ten, but neither were showing the effects. They _were_ demons, after all.

"Nah," Yusuke challenged. "I could drink more…" He paused and sniffed. He staggered up and walked unsteadily to Hiei. "Woah, Hiei, you's a stinky demon today!" He laughed.

"Really? Stand back, then." Kurama hopped off the barstool lightly and stepped away from Hiei, who was also now off his barstool. He pulled Yusuke back as well, since he was kind of drunk and hadn't stepped back on his own already.

Hiei's head was buzzing a bit as he stood. He was slightly drunk himself, otherwise he wouldn't have reacted at all to Yusuke's statement. He flared his aura. The next second, Hiei was consumed by red and orange flames. "There," he said. "Dirt gone, germs gone, stink gone. Are you _happy_ now, Detective?" he asked grumpily, lowering his flames. Yusuke blinked.

"WOAH… That's how you bathe??" he asked incredulously.

"I don't _bathe_, idiot. I _burn_ the uncleanliness away," said Hiei, still smoldering. The last of the flames went away and Hiei stood there smoking. Yusuke, in his drunken state, noticed like five minutes later, when Kurama and Hiei had both relaxed and had had a few more shots.

"OH MI GAWD, HIEI! You're burning!!" Yusuke yelled with a heavy slur to his words, sounding a little like Botan as he threw water on Hiei's head.

Hiei jumped in alarm and stiffened immediately after the water hit him. Kurama looked at Hiei, amazed. Hiei's expression was one of shock and fear. He shook a little. Kurama giggled quietly. 'He's like a kitten,' he thought. Hiei turned to Yusuke slowly, but wit anger. Kurama sensed the danger. 'but kittens have claws, too!' Kurama put his hand on Hiei's wet shoulder. Hiei jerked away.

"I… am going to KILL you, Urameshi!" Hiei growled.

"Erk!" was Yusuke's reply noise. Kurama stepped between the two and put both of his hands on Hiei's shoulders.

"Now, Hiei, don't' get upset! It was only a bit of water… Don't do anything rash, now...!"

Hiei glared at Yusuke from behind Kurama, but eventually calmed down. It took a while, however, as Hiei was more drunk that Kurama (because of his body mass) and needed quite a bit of persuasion. The tree sat down again and had even more alcohol.


	2. 2: The Rain

A/N: Teehee! That was a bad place to leave you off at, huh:) Oh well, perhaps this'll be a bit better! It's gonna be good—I'm typing all of this up at one in the morning, because I have no life! Aren't I happy? XD Oh well, better shut up and let you read…

Yusuke was completely wasted by this time, and even Kurama was tipsy. Hiei was leaning over the counter, apparently not realizing he was drunk. Yusuke began to giggle suddenly, causing the other two to stare at him. "Tee! You know, Hiei…" Yusuke paused to giggle more, "You know, the way you acted… You'd think that you were… _afraid of the water!_" Yusuke started laughing harder than ever and fell off _his_ barstool as well as Kuwabara. Kurama giggled and looked at Hiei, whose face was flushed. He looked pointedly away from Kurama. Kurama blinked.

"Hiei?" Kurama asked.

"What?" Hiei said irritably without turning. Kurama supposed he must still be blushing. He giggled a bit more.

"There's no way that's true, right?" Hiei was silent. "You're not REALLY afraid of the water, are you, Hiei?"

"Of course not. That's absurd!" Hiei said defensively. Kurama giggled again. "what's so amusing, Kurama?" Hiei asked angrily, turning.

"You _are_ still blushing! Oh, Hiei, you're so cute when you're flustered!" Hiei blinked and looked at Kurama like he was insane.

"Kurama, how many shots did you take when I wasn't looking?!" Kurama giggled and hiccupped. 'That was kinda cute…' Hiei blushed. 'AH! Just how drunk AM I?'

Kurama stood shakily. His face was a light pink. He put his hands on the back of Hiei's stool and looked down at the two humans. "We should get them back home, Hiei. Before we lose the ability to stand as well." Hiei nodded agreement. He'd never been drunk before, and he didn't quite enjoy the feeling. He stood up as well, weaving a bit as he did so. He picked up Yusuke and held him over his shoulder, Kurama doing the same with Kuwabara. They walked out onto the street together after Kurama paid the bill.

----------

Hiei and Kurama left Yusuke's house together. They had dropped Kuwabara off first, and now they were headed to Kurama's house (actually, Kurama's _mother's_ house) to sleep the rest of the alcohol off. They were a quarter of the way there when thunder rumbled overhead. Hiei jumped.

Kurama looked at the smaller demon, who had frozen up at the sound of the thunder. "Hiei? Is there something wrong?" Hiei turned to him stiffly. "What is it?"

"It's the—" Hiei's words were cut short by another thunderclap and the sudden downpour of rain Hiei gasped and shuddered violently when the curtain of rain hit him.

'He really _is_ afraid..!' Kurama thought. "Very afraid,' he thought, watching Hiei become desperate to get away. 'He'll snap from fear at this rate!' Kurama ran to Hiei and picked him up around the chest. He ran down the street carrying the smaller demon that way. 'We'll never make it to my mother's house in time… _I _can even feel Hiei's fear now,' Kurama thought in alarm, trying to shield Hiei from the rain while he ran. He stopped and looked around.

There was an alley to their left. Kurama darted down the dark alley and pressed himself and Hiei against one of the buildings, himself back first. They were partially sheltered from the rain this way by the eaves of the building, but they were both soaked to the skin. Kurama could feel Hiei shivering in his arms through both of their coats. Without letting go, Kurama backed both of tem into a corner and sat down with Hiei.

Kurama leaned against the wall and held Hiei to his chest. Hiei was still shaking and stared out at the rain as he sat between Kurama's legs and let himself become enfolded in Kurama's comforting arms. He held Kurama's arm closer to him and felt Kurama shiver. He looked up.

"Hiei, you're so cold," Kurama said, holding Hiei closer to him. Hiei nodded a little.

"I can't use my fire when I'm wet," Hiei said quietly. Kurama pressed his cheek to the top of Hiei's head.

"That's okay. I'll keep you warm myself." Hiei turned to rest of his side and laid on Kurama with his head just under Kurama's chin. His left arm was folded underneath him, and he brought up his right arm to hold Kurama's shirt and cling to him, still afraid. Kurama smiled and held Hiei tightly. "Oh, Hiei. You can be so cute sometimes."

"Are you still drunk?" Hiei asked irritably, but rather comically due to his position. Kurama laughed lightly.

"No, I really mean it. And actually, I've thought so for a long time now." Hiei blushed confusedly, to Kurama's immense amusement. "You should sleep, Hiei," he laughed. "Look, the rain's even letting up a little." It wasn't, but it seemed to calm Hiei down to the point where he relaxed and fell asleep on Kurama's chest.

"Hiei, you're adorable," Kurama murmured into Hiei's hair as he fell asleep as well.

----------

Sooo! How was that, guys? Hehe, I need to sleep, but I won't… After typing this up, I bent my wrists a little and they made an unhealthy sounding snappy noise. So I hope you appreciate the pain my wrists and back went through for you! R&R please? Thankiees:3


	3. 3: Kurama's Offer

Kurama awoke very slowly the next morning. He was wet, dirty, on the ground, and didn't remember how he'd gotten there. He didn't open his eyes, but ran a hand through his soaked, gritty hair, not noticing the weight on his chest.

The movement disturbed the sleeping demon. He groaned and rolled over in his sleep. Kurama jumped at the surprise, remembering the night's events in a rush. Hiei sat up slowly as a half-smile tugged at Kurama's face. Hiei opened his eyes slowly and blinke at Kurama. "Morning, Hiei," Kurama said sleepily. Hiei groaned as a response. He brought up his hand to rub his right eye and immediately recoiled, grunting. "What is it, Hiei?" Kurama asked.

"I got dirt in my eye," said Hiei.

"Let me get it," Kurama prompted. He extended his arm to help hiei, but stopped when he looked at his sleeve. He looked down at himself and Hiei. Aside from still being wet, they were both covered in mud and dirt from the ground and the walls they had been sleeping against. "Hiei, look at us; we're filthy!" Hiei looked down at himself, his right eye squeezed shut. "I guess that's what we get from sleeping outside in the rain. Come on, I rather dislike being dirty," he said, stepping into the sunlight. Hiei stood instantly clapping his hands to the sides of his head. He groaned loudly and leaned against the wall, grimacing.

"Damn it… I'm still wet… I can't use my fire," Hiei muttered. Kurama chuckled.

"You wouldn't be able to safely use your flames anyway, Hiei. You have what's called a hangover. Your head hurts, doesn't it?" Hiei nodded. "And you feel a bit nauseous?" Another nod. "And as soon as you start moving, you'll find you're sensitive to light and sound." Hiei groaned. Kurama laughed and put his arm under Hiei's, supporting him. "Come on, Hiei. I know a place where we can go." Hiei nodded again, gingerly snaking his arm across Kurama's back and around his waist, letting Kurama lead him through back roads and alleys.

The two stumbled along (mostly only Hiei was stumbling) for what seemed like hours to Hiei, until they arrived at a very plain, very ordinary-looking house. Kurama opened the door and stepped in, taking off his shoes. He motioned for Hiei to do the same. "I'm home, mother!" Kurama called.

"Shuichi, please don't yell. I'm right here," a woman said, stepping out of the kitchen.

'My thoughts exactly,' Hiei thought through the pounding in his head.

"Sorry, mother," said Kurama with a smile.

"My goodness, Shuichi!" his mother exclaimed. "You're a mess! What have you been doing? And you haven't introduced your friend! You're both soaking and absolutely filthy! Have you been in a fight? Or were you—!"

"Mother, please," Kurama intermitted through his mother's babbling. "We were just caught out in the rain, that's all, really." She stared at Kurama, looking taken aback.

"So did you sleep—?"

"Mother!" Kurama interrupted again, blushing at his mother's assumptions. Hiei closed his eyes.

'What is she getting at..?' he thought tiredly.

"All right," Kurama began again. "Mother, this is my friend, Hiei. He's very sick and needs a place to rest, so I brought him here. Okay?" Kurama said all of this very deliberately. His mother nodded slowly.

"Very well," she said, turning to Hiei and clasping his hand. "My, my, Hiei! You're _very_ sick! You're practically freezing!" She turned to Kurama. "Shuichi, what are you doing? You need to get your sick friend out of those clothes!! Get a move on!" she ushered them out of the room and went back to the kitchen, switching rapidly from 'tell me everything' to 'go help your friend.' By the time end of all of this, both boys were bright red. They stood at the entrance to the hallway, dumbfounded.

"W-Well… she's right, you know. Staying in wet clothes really will make us sick…" Kurama stammered, still blushing.

"I don't have other clothes…" Hiei mumbled. 'Does that mean I'll have to go naked?!' He shivered.

"Hiei, you're shivering. You can borrow some of my clothes… they'll be a bit big for you, but if you don't mind…" Kurama trailed off. Hiei averted his gaze and nodded. "But… Clean clothes mean nothing if we aren't clean…" Hiei frowned at Kurama curiously.

"What are you getting at..?" Kurama hesitated.

"You need a bath, Hiei."


	4. 4: The Bath!

Hiei stared. "NO. WAY." Kurama sighed. He steered Hiei into his room and picked out two different pairs of clothes. For himself, he chose a pair of white pants and a golden colored shirt. For Hiei, he pulled out a pastel yellow pair of pajamas with pink peeps and blue bunnies. He set these on the floor and forced Hiei into the bathroom before Hiei knew what was going on. He locked the door behind him and stood in front of it. Hiei looked at Kurama like he was insane. The fact the entire bathroom was white intimidated him.

"Kurama, what are you doing?" he asked defensively.

"I was hoping to not have to force you, Hiei," Kurama said. Hiei coiled, backing into the wall. Kurama couldn't help but notice this. "Hiei," he started. Hiei shook his head and looked up from the corner, which he had just moved into. "Hiei, don't make me force you," Kurama said a bit sadly. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Hiei, especially with him in that state of mind.

'Why does it sound like a threat when he says that?' Hiei thought. He shook his head again.

"Hiei!" Kurama exclaimed, exasperated. He charged at Hiei, grabbing his wrists when Hiei tried to defend himself. Hiei recoiled from Kurama as best as he could, but was stopped by the counter and the wall.

"I don't want to get any wetter, Kur—!" The words were stopped short by an unexpected kiss. Hiei's eyes grew wide, and he let his arms go limp, held up only by Kurama's arms. The kiss was gentle but quick, and over sooner than Kurama would have liked. Hiei stared with his mouth slightly open, Kurama still holding his wrists.

"Would you please take a bath, Hiei?" Kurama asked softly, looking at Hiei with gently pleading eyes. Hiei stared at them. He felt totally hypnotized by the calming green of Kurama's eyes. He couldn't seem to make his body move. "I promise you'll feel better," assured Kurama gently. Hiei tilted his head a little.

"Why did you..?" he trailed off. Kurama smiled and laced his fingers with Hiei's.

"I couldn't help it. I couldn't resist anymore. It got too hard to; you're just too cute," he laughed. He let go of Hiei's hands, which came to rest limply at his sides. Kurama walked Hiei and sat him down on the toilet and began to run the bathwater. Hiei tensed. "Relax, Hiei," Kurama said, noticing. "I promise this will be a pleasant experience," he finished convincingly. Hiei seemed to accept this, as he relaxed and watched Kurama curiously.

The water was hot, but not scalding. Kurama stirred the water with his fingertips as it ran from the chrome faucet. He stood and walked to the cabinet over the sink, opening it to reveal various bottles, tubes, and jars. Kurama searched the cabinet's contents, choosing a small, orange bottle of leaves, a clear glass jar with salt in it, and a round, plastic container with some blue liquid in it to put on the bathtub's edge.

He opened the small orange bottle with a pop, picked out one of the leaves, and crushed it in his hand. He sprinkled it in the water and a smell of flowers permeated the air. Hiei leaned against the wall, oddly comforted by the familiar smell. He recognized it from somewhere, but couldn't place it. Kurama inhaled deeply and let out a leisurely sigh.

"Hiei, would you open this?" Kurama asked, holding the salt jar out to Hiei. Hiei nodded and took it, opening it without a problem and handing it back to Kurama. "Thank you," Kurama said, shaking a bit of the salt into his palm and distributing it evenly into the tub. He closed the jar and stirred the water with his fingertips a little more. Hiei watched with growing interest.

"What's that stuff, fox?" he asked, indicating the items. Kurama smiled.

"It's what I always use in my baths. Now come here for a minute, please, Hiei?" Hiei's eyes narrowed.

"Why?" he asked suspiciously. Kurama looked at his reproachfully.

"I just want you to help, Hiei," Kurama said, mock pouting a little. It wasn't like he needed Hiei's help; he just knew that if Hiei had helped in preparing the water, he would feel more comfortable when he got in it. "You can be so paranoid sometimes," he joked with a smile. Hiei scowled and dropped to his knees beside Kurama. He looked at the fox expectantly, waiting. Kurama smiled a little and handed the bottle with the blue liquid in it to Hiei. "Pour a little of this into the water," Kurama instructed. Hiei was confused, but did as he was told. He wanted to see what this odd mixture would do to the bath. Nothing happened. Hiei looked disappointedly at Kurama.

"It didn't do anything, fox," Hiei said. Kurama smiled and took Hiei's hand.

"Watch," he said, as he moved Hiei's hand to stir the water with him. He could feel Hiei's arm tense as they touched the water together, but wonder slowly replaced fear as bubbles started to form in the white tub. Their hands moved together in wide circles, Kurama's leading Hiei's around, eventually calming Hiei. Kurama let go and turned the water off. He turned to Hiei. "Well, Hiei… You need to… get out of those clothes…" Hiei stared.

"With you right there?! No way in hell," he said incredulously. Kurama's head drooped to the side.

"I know full well you'd never take it if I left and didn't watch," he said.

"I'm not going to if you DO watch!" Hiei said loudly. Kurama stared at him with a longing look. Hiei felt himself begin to snap. 'Damn those eyes!'

"Hiei, please?" Kurama implored. Hiei resisted Kurama's gaze and refused again. Kurama put a hand on Hiei's knee, and a chill shot up through Hiei's spine. Hiei clenched his fists to restrain himself.

'_Why_ must his eyes be so pretty?!' Hiei thought wildly before he grabbed Kurama's face and pulled it in to meet his own. Kurama jumped and widened his eyes in surprise before relaxing and returning the kiss. He took the opportunity to start trying to take off Hiei's dirty, wet cloak. Hiei growled his protest into Kurama's throat, but the fox eventually managed to get Hiei's cloak off. His shirt was easier to throw off, but Hiei squirmed a bit and pushed Kurama away from him firmly, almost violently once he was completely shirtless. "Stop that!" Kurama sighed.

"I'm not going to waste this bath, Hiei," Kurama said, a bit frustrated.

"Then don't," Hiei replied. Kurama turned around on his knees.

"I won't." Kurama looked down and fiddled with the front of his shirt so that Hiei couldn't see. He rolled his shoulders as he slid his shirt off and dropped it on the floor beside him with a squelchy _florp_ sound. Hiei's jaw dropped at this.

"What are you doing?!"

"If you won't take the bath, I will." Hiei had a sudden urge to touch Kurama's back and run his fingers down the lines of the muscles there. Kurama looked back at the wide-eyed Hiei. "Unless you want to take the bath _with_ me?" he added. Hiei looked appalled.

"WHAT??" Kurama's mouth formed a little 'o' before he giggled.

"I didn't mean it like _that_," he laughed. "But it's generally considered okay to take a bath with family or a close friend, in my case, to help them wash. It's supposed to be flattering to be asked…"

"Hn," Hiei grunted slowly.

Kurama studied Hiei silently, but his eyes were laughing at Hiei's being out of his element. His face slowly cracked in a wide grin. "You want to," he teased. Hiei glared, but Kurama was unphased. He looked away for a minute at some perceived noise. He heard the water being disturbed, and when he looked back, Hiei was sitting rather uncomfortably in the tub. Kurama smiled amusedly at Hiei's expression. A third of it was sheer horror at being in the water, another third was wonder that he was in the water at all, and the last third was relief at finding the water was nice.

"Well. Hn." He looked up at Kurama, adorably clueless as to what to do next. Kurama laughed out loud.

"Do I have to help you, Hiei?" Kurama asked seriously, stifling another giggle. Hiei stuck out his chin and looked at the ceiling.

"If you must…"

Kurama smiled and stood, simultaneously stepping out of his pants and carefully into the tub. Hiei scooted away from him a bit. "Hiei, would you hand me that bottle? The red one, by your head," Kurama said, pointing.

"What is it?" Hiei asked, watching Kurama squeeze some red, sweet-smelling goo into his palm.

"It's shampoo. For your hair," Kurama added, seeing the blank expression on Hiei's face. "Now turn around and tilt your head backwards." Hiei narrowed his eyes at Kurama, but slowly turned and looked up. A mischievous glint came into Kurama's eyes as he decided to have a bit of fun. He leaned forward to whisper into Hiei's ear. "Hold your breath," was uttered just before Kurama moved out of the way to duck Hiei's head underwater. Kurama pushed Hiei up gently, holding in all his giggles. Hiei came up angry and sputtering.

"Kurama, what the hell?!" he coughed out. He turned to glare at the fox, but closed his eyes in relaxation when Kurama began massaging Hiei's head with the shampoo. He leaned back and sighed contentedly.

"I told you, Hiei," Kurama said, working his fingers through Hiei's dripping hair.

"Mmm-hmm," he said lazily, earning a full-blown smile from Kurama. He stopped lathering to cup a handful of water and washed it through Hiei's hair. Hiei jumped—he wasn't expecting that—and his hand flew to the edge of the tub.

"Relax, Hiei, I had to rinse it out," Kurama laughed, starting on the not-so-sudzy- conditioner.

As Kurama began to wash Hiei's head again, Hiei thought for a moment why the smell of the bath calmed him down so much. After a minute, he realized with a smile. It was the smell of Kurama.


End file.
